We can have all the knowledge in the universe, but it still comes down to only one thing - practice. (Crescent Moon Bear Fable, as recounted by C.P. Estes)
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
Whatever (aka the sin of Apathy)
- sorry - had to take this posting down for now - but more will come in another form :) -
Sad really to be so accepting of rude and abusive behavior. No, anger cant change what he did. But it is good to express our hurts, no? And to know we are valuable persons who deserve respect.
It is always good to express hurts ... no matter what the outcome. My friend and I were talking about this over lunch today. We are both qualitative researchers that believe that there is no one, singular objective truth. Just different experiences of truth and that each one is valid in its own way. thanks suki - you'll find my next post interesting, I think!
I feel like.....she shouldn't expect the expression of her anger to change things, but rather to show that things like that shouldn't be taken in stride hands down. They'll keep happening, but perhaps in her expression she'll find something about herself that will help her process the experience and use it for her next relationship.
I think there is always something to be gained in the process. Western society is far too much focused on the “outcome” instead of what we learn from process – no matter what the outcome brings.
This reminds me of years ago when I ran into a former love (we'd lived together for two years). You know how it's strange that often it's easier to talk years after a breakup than it was in the relationship? I asked him why he never asked me to marry him. He shocked me with the obvious, "Because you were always talking against marriage." My feigned apathy, or antipathy, sure worked.....
I'm a writer of several genres: young adult, speculative fiction, and non-fiction. I seek to unearth the extraordinary in the ordinary and share what I find with others.
6 comments:
Sad really to be so accepting of rude and abusive behavior. No, anger cant change what he did. But it is good to express our hurts, no? And to know we are valuable persons who deserve respect.
It is always good to express hurts ... no matter what the outcome. My friend and I were talking about this over lunch today. We are both qualitative researchers that believe that there is no one, singular objective truth. Just different experiences of truth and that each one is valid in its own way. thanks suki - you'll find my next post interesting, I think!
I feel like.....she shouldn't expect the expression of her anger to change things, but rather to show that things like that shouldn't be taken in stride hands down. They'll keep happening, but perhaps in her expression she'll find something about herself that will help her process the experience and use it for her next relationship.
I think there is always something to be gained in the process. Western society is far too much focused on the “outcome” instead of what we learn from process – no matter what the outcome brings.
This reminds me of years ago when I ran into a former love (we'd lived together for two years). You know how it's strange that often it's easier to talk years after a breakup than it was in the relationship? I asked him why he never asked me to marry him. He shocked me with the obvious, "Because you were always talking against marriage." My feigned apathy, or antipathy, sure worked.....
Feigned apathy is the worst, indeed Lydia. We must be careful what we wish for (consciously or subconsciously!)
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